The first time I took a vacation as a single mom with my son, Alex, then 14 months old, I came back exhausted and in desperate need of a vacation. We had taken a 24-hour Amtrak train trip to Orlando, Florida. By the time the train pulled into the station, the itsy bitsy spider had become a gigantic tarantula, and I was feeling equally venomous.

Know your parental rights

Making my living as a travel writer, I’ve gone on to travel to many places with my son and each journey has been a live-and-learn experience. For instance, the first time we embarked on an adventure outside of the United States was to Jamaica in the Caribbean. Because I was a single mother, I was surprised to learn that I was required to have a notarized letter from my ex-husband giving me permission to take Alex out of the country.

“We highly recommend to any of our single parents traveling internationally that they get a notarized letter from the other parent stating that they can travel out of the country,” says Deborah Shannon-Orgel, Leisure Travel Specialist with Coronado Travel, in association with Altour. “In fact, we have a sample letter that we give to our clients,” she adds. Of course, not everyone can provide this letter when traveling, says Shannon-Orgel, such as if you are a widow, in which case she recommends you bring the proper paper work along (i.e., death certificate) to prove that you have the right to leave the country with your child.

Spend more quality time together

As Alex got older, I chose to stay at hotels and resorts that had reputable children’s programs, giving him a chance to hang out with other kids and to buy me some free time. Hyatt, Club Med, Ritz-Carlton and Beaches brands all feature great programs at their resorts. And now that my son is a teen, he begs to bring a friend along on our vacations, and we have done so our last two summers. (Read here for advice on how to ensure the trip goes smoothly.)

Still, taking a vacation as a single parent with a child can be an ideal way to spend time together, especially for single parents who don’t get to spend much time with their kids because of work or non-custodial issues. “Many single parents want this time to enjoy with their kids and choose not to go to places where their kids are off all day in a children’s program and they are separated,” says Shannon-Orgel. “This year we planned a wonderful African safari tour for a single mom traveling with her 14-year-old son. It was an experience of a lifetime for them.”

Cost considerations

A caveat for single parents while traveling is that it can cost you more than if you were sharing the room with another adult. All-inclusive hotels and resorts often charge per person rates based on double occupancy room nights and will charge a supplement if two adults are not sharing the room. However, there are some all-inclusive resorts, like Beaches Resorts in the Caribbean, that address this problem by waiving the single supplement fee (of up to $190 per night) during what it calls the Single Parent Fun (SPF) months between mid-August and October. The program also reaches out to single dads. “For plenty of single dads, especially those who do not have their children full-time, the thought of planning a vacation by themselves is daunting,” says John Lynch, executive vice-president of Unique Vacations and the worldwide representative for Beaches Resorts. “We take every possible measure to make it easy for dads to plan a trip with the kids.” Families who sign up for SPF can participate in tailored activities and events including a single parent welcome reception, social cocktail reception and kid’s movies nights.